“Imagine that you are a powerful and mysterious stage magician, right. In this metaphor, I suppose Lan-dage is your glamorous assistant, which--ok, that’d be a very good look for him. No jobs or responsibilities except to stand around looking beautiful and occasionally gesturing at you in a ‘Look how magnificent, have you ever seen anything so spectacular’ sort of way.”

Meng Yao allows Wei Wuxian to see the slightest hint of a smile, because this image does rather please him. “But you have come into my kitchen to complain about being in the audience.”

“I have come into the kitchen to tell the great and powerful wizard that I have a master’s degree in engineering and I’m fully capable of operating any number of levers and trapdoors and hidden mirrors and flamethrowers, if the wizard would be so kind as to allow me step behind the curtain.”

***

Two gremlins, sitting through a tense family dinner, flirting with their husbands as emotional aftercare.